Practical Guidance for Same-Sex Couples and Parents
** For further information, check out our companion resource: Beyond the Basics: Deeper Protections for LGBTQ+ Families **
As we approach the 10th anniversary of Obergefell v. Hodges—our landmark Supreme Court decision that secured the freedom to marry for same-sex couples nationwide—we honor the resilience and love of LGBTQ+ families through the long years of advocacy and to this day. While we celebrate this milestone, we also face a reality where some lawmakers continue to use our families as political targets.
In the first half of 2025, bills and resolutions were introduced in at least nine states challenging marriage equality—five urging the Supreme Court to overturn Obergefell, and four proposing marriage categories limited to heterosexual couples. And now the Southern Baptist Convention, the nation’s largest Protestant denomination, has set reversal of Obergefell as a priority. These developments are frightening and offensive. But they are also legally meaningless.
- They do not change the law.
- They cannot undo your marriage.
- They will not stop same-sex couples from marrying.
Still, we understand the fear these headlines create—and we know that for families with LGBTQ+ members, especially those living in hostile states, now is the time to take proactive steps to secure and protect the rights we’ve fought so hard to achieve.
This guide provides basic information and practical steps for safeguarding family relationships, particularly for same-sex couples and LGBTQ+ parents.
Note: This guide is for general educational purposes and is not legal advice. Because state laws vary, we strongly encourage speaking with an attorney licensed in your state.
[This page was last updated June 2025]
Marriage Equality Under Law
What to Know
- Obergefell v. Hodges is still the law. Only the Supreme Court can reverse it, and there is currently no case before the Court seeking to do so. Proposals in states like Idaho and Texas cannot override this constitutional right.
- The Respect for Marriage Act, enacted in 2022, requires the federal government and all states to recognize the marriages of same-sex and interracial couples performed validly in any state—even if some states were to attempt to ban those marriages in the future.
- If Obergefell were ever overturned, couples could still marry in many states, and their marriages would continue to be fully recognized nationwide thanks to the Respect for Marriage Act.
What to Consider
- Marriage: If you’re considering marriage and live in a state where laws may shift, marrying now may provide extra peace of mind. You can marry in any state today, and all states must recognize that marriage.
- Divorce: If you’re thinking about divorce, seek legal advice, especially in states considering restrictions on no-fault divorce. If this is something you might want to pursue, consider acting promptly to understand the process and your options.
- Life-Planning Documents: Keep key documents up to date. These can include wills, powers of attorney, beneficiary designations, and health care directives, and they can be important whether or not you’re married to ensure your wishes are known and can be honored even in parts of the country less supportive of LGBTQ+ rights. For those who can, it is best to retain an estate planning attorney in your state to do this.
Securing Legal Ties with Your Children
What to Know
- When a child is born to a married couple, both spouses are presumed by law to be parents to the child regardless of whether either parent gave birth or provided genetic material. This principle has been important to married same-sex couples just as it has been for married different-sex couples who plan for and bring a child or children into their family.
- But the laws can vary in terms of the strength of this legal presumption and when it can be challenged. For same-sex parents in particular, questions about these legal ties might arise if the validity of their marriage were to be attacked in the future.
What to Consider
- Adopting your children. It can seem strange and certainly is burdensome, but a court judgment of adoption can be the most effective way to secure either or both parents’ legal ties to their children when biological ties are lacking. This can be important when a couple plans for a child together, and when a single parent of an existing child forms a new spousal or domestic partner relationship and wishes to secure that new adult’s relationship with the child.
- In some states, the Family Code provides an explicit procedure for a spouse or domestic partner to secure a parent-child relationship via a stepparent or second-parent adoption without disrupting the child’s legal tie with the existing legal parent. In some states, court decisions confirm the availability of these adoptions. If this is relevant to you, try to find an attorney in your county that specializes in family law issues affecting LGBTQ+ people.
Is Obergefell at Risk?
The Supreme Court’s 2022 decision in Dobbs v. Jackson—which overturned Roe v. Wade—caused widespread concern that other rights, including the freedom to marry, could be next. In that case, Justice Clarence Thomas explicitly called for reconsidering past rulings, including Obergefell. Justice Samuel Alito also has repeatedly called for Obergefell to be reconsidered.
But here’s what we know:
- There is no active case before the Supreme Court seeking to overturn Obergefell.
- The Court has not signaled an intent to revisit the decision.
- Public support for marriage equality is strong—70% of Americans support it, a level of consensus that adds political and social weight to its continued vitality.
- Even if Obergefell were reconsidered, existing marriages would remain valid under the Respect for Marriage Act, and many states would still welcome same-sex couples who wish to marry there, whether or not they are state residents.
Lambda Legal continues to closely monitor the courts for any case that could threaten marriage equality. If a credible challenge arises, we will act swiftly to inform and defend our community.
Moving Forward with Knowledge and Confidence
What to Know
- The push to undermine marriage equality is real—but mostly symbolic at this time. These bills and religious resolutions cannot undo your marriage. They do not have the power to override constitutional protections or federal law.
- Even with strong federal protections, taking proactive steps can protect your rights and give you peace of mind—especially in uncertain environments.
- Looking for more? Check out our companion guide: Beyond the Basics: Deeper Protections for LGBTQ+ Families. This supplemental resource offers additional tools and strategies to help LGBTQ+ families strengthen legal, practical, and emotional security—especially in states where protections may be weaker.
What to Consider
- Act Early: LGBTQ+-affirming attorneys are in high demand, and access varies by region. If you anticipate needing legal help—whether for marriage, divorce, adoption, or document changes—don’t wait.
- Get Connected:
- Contact Lambda Legal’s Help Desk for additional information about your situation. The Help Desk does not give legal advice but usually has helpful information, can assist you to understand information you find online, and might have contact information for lawyers in your area with expertise relevant to your needs.
- The National LGBTQ+ Bar also might be able to provide contact information for LGBTQ+-friendly lawyers in your area or for a local bar association that provides attorney referrals.
Crisis Resources
Lambda Legal’s Help Desk is not able to assist with emergencies or immediate requests for legal assistance. Please contact a crisis hotline or any legal service provider that is equipped to provide emergency assistance.
These services are independent from Lambda Legal and specialize in crisis intervention:
- LGBT National Hotline: www.LGBThotline.org | 888-843-4564
- LGBT National Youth Talkline: www.LGBThotline.org/youth-talkline | 800-246-7743
- LGBT National Senior Hotline: www.LGBThotline.org/senior-hotline | 888-234-7243
- Trans Lifeline: www.translifeline.org/hotline | 877-565-8860
- The Trevor Project: www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now | 866-488-7386
10 Years of Marriage Equality—and Still Fighting
We celebrate a decade of marriage equality with clear eyes: our rights remain strong, but the fight to protect and expand them continues. Stay informed. Take proactive steps. And remember, even in challenging times, the law remains firmly on the side of love and dignity.
Taking action now is not about fear—it’s about love, preparedness, and pride.